If this is all about love, then I’m a monkey’s uncle. One of the most roundly criticized films in recent memory (reports have most of the stars disowning it before release, with poor Claire Danes reduced to tears by it), this is a sci-fi bit of nonsense that covers the gamut from human cloning to global warming/freak weather to fear of flying. Yes, there’s a love story — which has Joaquin Phoenix having second thoughts on a divorce from Danes, both of whom affect awful faux Polish accents. For some reason, they decide to ‘escape’ New York, which lands them in a snowbound ice age in July. I challenge you to make any sense out of this thing — and I’m led to question my previous esteem for Celebration director Thomas Vinterberg — but hey, Claire Danes sure is purty. Look, a squirrel!